Monday, 9 April 2007

Pontius Parking

A succinct round-up of my Easter fun, which ended up being some kind of weird quasi-biblical parable featuring parking wardens and a knackered air bed.
First of all, I'm really noticing the marked contrast between Hull and Lincolnshire every day. The drive across the Wolds features crazy green sprayers, squashed animals and weird villages like Great (Loose And) Limber, and, I kid you not, a place called New York, which is just a crossroads with a church and a dose of bad feeling. But the Wolds is nothing compared with Spring Bank West, the last but one street on my return home. Last week I saw a granddad actively encouraging his top-off grandson to go on the nick ("go on, son, cow and gates and a copy of Psychologies"). Anyways, moving on.
Friday began with the modern interpretation of Jesus on a donkey. Hull's parking enforcers, Park Smart, on their little mopod's, were on my street, giving little Good Friday £60 tickets to the illegally parked. Not sure what Jesus would make of their blatant disregard of Bank Holidays. Nice that Hull City Council can ignore the crucifixition by turning the screw on motorists. I managed to move my car in time, only to get into a spot of road rage with an over-75. Hang on, I thought, I've just raised £5k for you lot, so you can cut me up at a junction.
Typical. Saturday was spent laughing at Jeffrey Archer's missing statues in Grantchester, Cambridgeshire. Our Easter Sunday was spent realising that the airbed we were sleeping on round at Dee's mums had a puncture and we were flat on our backs. Luckily, some duct tape and a pump enabled us to create our own resurrection of the airbed in the early hours. The bed rose, and peace was brought to a troubled Doncaster.
House update: Gazzumped
Listening: Alexander 'Skip' Spence. Recorded with Moby Grape. Went mad, attacked band with axe, sent to Bellevue, discharged and biked to Nashville in pajamas, recorded cracked solo album, died penniless, you know the drill; Nelly Furtado
Robert Wyatt radar: Glimpsed beraded through window cradling a hot tea

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